outta work

ive been out of work for 3 days. and a little excited to go back, well not really. what did i do with that 3 days. hmm more sleep. ii went out with a friend but didnt really enjoyed it i dunno. i know that there's a lot going on with me and im on a denial. . a lot of things are on my mind now. but i dint how to put it into words. yes im out of words. i dont know where to start.

hmm.. okey okey. i miss him. and i think about him everyday. but i dont have anybody to have this emotions out. i dont want my coworkers to know that im struggling. i dont want them to know that im infact affected still affected. i dont want them to know that he still matters to me, that i still long for the day that things will be the way it used to be.hoping for the day that we will be able to talk. laugh again. and spend time together again.